I sat in the luminous meadow. The moon was bright that night shining upon every blade of grass and glowing upon every petal of every flower. I Lay back into the damp field. I could feel the cold earth against my back and the long grass tickled as it brushed my cheeks. I stared up into the heavens above glancing up at the full moon. Three years ago, in this very spot was the first time I had ever seen him. His radiant beauty glowed as he sat among the lilies painting landscapes. I remember watching him from the trees my innocent eyes looking upon him as he used every stroke of the brush, designing...creating a secret masterpiece for his eyes only. His easel was set into the damp earth. In one hand was a pallet, in the other was a brush. I watched him slowly swoop his brush through the enamel gloss and apply it to the canvas. I strained my neck stretching reaching to see what was going on behind the easel. He had captured my soul by simply painting. He had entranced me as I watched mesmerized by his work. I had watched him many times glancing at him from the shadows. I always saw him and who he was but he knew nothing about me. But on that golden night in the peace I slipped out from behind the shadows and softly walked towards him. He slowly rose his head from his work and our eyes met. He asked me to join him. I then sat that night with him watching observing him painting. He painted with such elegance and such grace. We laughed that night and we talked as we sat together. He had whispered to me that night that I was beautiful...He had told me that I was special...He wanted me to stay with him forever...He had told me that he loved me...He had spoken all of those things that night and in my innocence I believed him. I had watched him paint in the meadows until the sun peeked over the trees. In all of my fatigue I had fallen asleep. When I saw the suns rays sweep across my face. I opened my eyes. I sat up abruptly he had disappeared into the forest. I looked around and my eyes fell upon the easel. I felt a tear roll down my cheek as my eye fixed upon the picture. He had painted a woman in this meadow...she was beautiful with ruby lips and raven hair. He was holding her in his arms. And painted the words FOREVER through the painting. It was at that moment that I knew that I would never see him again. I had waisted months of my life falling in love with a man who would never love me...he used me....whispering his malicious lies trying to wound an innocent girl like me into thinking that he loved me. "You never loved me"...I whispered regretfully. I suppose that I had always known that he hadn't but he had lead me on holding my heart by a thread. "I hate you!" I whispered frustratedly. With that I grabbed his painting, the painting I had watched him work on for weeks at a time. I had watched him from the shadows and from by his side. I grabbed up the painting and with all my strength I threw it across the meadow into the woods. I fell back. I sat in the luminous meadow. The moon was bright that night shining upon every blade of grass and glowing upon every petal of every flower. I lay back into the damp field. I could feel the cold earth against my back and the long grass tickled as it brushed my cheeks. I stared up into the heavens above glancing up into the full moon. I ripped a single daisy from which was clinging to the soft earth. Slowly with a small almost evil smile I whispered "He loves me....He loves me not..."
PurpleEyesRBeautiful
I learned to live half a life
And now you want me one more time
Who do you think you are?
Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
Tearing love apart
Your gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are???
Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri
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